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User blog:Stofferex/Stoff Complains Episode 3- Wasps
Welcome back to "Stoff Complains" the place where an angry swedish guy bitch about things for your enjoyment! Wasps, a.k.a the nature's asshole. Urgh, I really hate them and I like animals alot. My favorite one being Lion. And I really appreciate when some animals helps us. Like the bee. Bees polinate flowers and such and give us a beautiful and colorful nature. And they give us honey. So thank you bee for being an awesome sport. But then you have the bees evil brother. The wasp. Unlike the bees wasps DOESN'T pollinate, it DOESN'T give us honey, it DOESN'T do jack shit except for hunting our asses down and sting us. Seriously, these little bastards makes the manliest of men look like a sissy. But I don't blame him, wanna know why? BECAUSE IT'S A FUCKING WASP! I feel like wasps are the only creature created by Satan himself, no not God but motherfucking Satan Lucifer the Devil the First. Like I said, what the hell does a wasp do thats so good for us or the nature? From what I know... ABSOLUTELY GOD DAMN NOTHING! Somehow, chasing us with their venomous stinger is like a sport for them. They think its hilarious to see us scared shitless. I feel like wasps usually attack if they know we have some sort of sugar on us. During the summer, I usually drink alot of juice because otherwise I would pass out because of the heat and juice is delicious. But thats when the wasps shows up. They just know that I have a glass of juice and they will not take No for an answer. They just want that sugery filled liquid. And as a cherry on the top for them, they thinks its hilarious to scare the living fuck out of you and pointing their venomous stinger at you. It's really annoying when you're trying to stand still. For example: A long time ago on a summer camp, me and the rest of my class were playing some sort of game where you couldn't move or else you loose. And of course, the hellspawns in a bee costume knew this so they basically attacked me and my class for no fucking reason. Let's just say, no one won since every one was running and screaming for their lives. God damn these pesky Bees~ Robin, DHMIS 3. But thankfully there are creatures that are on our side. Here's some creaters that makes the wasps look like pussy ass bitches. 1. Birds- Probably the most common insect eater. They can swallow those dicks (that came out really wrong) and their little pussy ass stingers wont do shit. Thank you birds! 2. Spiders- I know many of you fucking hate spiders for some reason. Just because 8 legs, many eyes but god dammit people. Stop being a spider racist and actually look what they're doing. They are getting rid of filthy creaters you don't want in your house. Flies? Easy meal. Cockroaches? Very rare, but they have been devouring them before. And of course, Wasps. 3. Pray Mantis- Really aggressive little fellow if you ask me but they are fucking beasts in the small world. These monsters will make the wasps their bitch and its just a fucking snack for them. So ye, I guess thats all. Oh yeah I got a sollution: Either you stand fucking still and don't move a muscle. There's no guarantee but they may leave you alone. If not, then swat the bastards several times to make sure they stay dead and spit on their corpse and scream: FUCK YOU WASP! GO TO HELL WHERE YOU BELONG! Next Episode So, now thats out of the way. Good because they fucking deserv- Random Dude: K! Excuse me? What did you sa- Random Dude: K! Please Sto- Random Dude: K! K! K! K! K! K! K! K! K! Urgh... Category:Blog posts